Bringing up postpartum depression with your doctor can feel intimidating, especially if you’re worried about being judged or not being taken seriously. Here’s how to make that conversation as easy and productive as possible.
You Don’t Need to Have the “Right” Words
You don’t have to diagnose yourself or explain things perfectly. It’s enough to say something like:
- “I don’t feel like myself and it’s been going on for weeks.”
- “I’m having a hard time bonding with my baby and I’m scared to admit it.”
- “I feel anxious or angry all the time and I don’t know why.”
- “I think I might have postpartum depression.”
Any of these openers give your provider what they need to start asking follow-up questions.
Before the Appointment
- Jot down a few specific examples of what you’ve been experiencing and when they started
- Note how it’s affecting your daily life: sleep, appetite, ability to care for baby, relationships
- If you’re comfortable, track your mood for a few days beforehand, even a simple 1-10 rating helps
- Bring a support person if that makes it easier to speak up
During the Appointment
- Be as specific and honest as you can, even about the parts that feel scary to say out loud, like intrusive thoughts or feeling detached from the baby. Providers are trained to hear this without judgment.
- Ask direct questions: “What are my treatment options?” “Is this normal or should I be concerned?” “What would you recommend if this were your patient?”
- If you feel dismissed, it’s okay to ask for a referral to a perinatal mental health specialist or a second opinion.
Who You Can Talk To
You don’t have to wait for your six-week postpartum visit. You can bring this up with:
- Your OB or midwife
- Your primary care provider
- Your baby’s pediatrician (many screen parents at well-baby visits)
- A therapist you find directly, especially one who specializes in perinatal mental health
A Note on Screening Tools
Many providers use a screening questionnaire called the Edinburgh Postnatal Depression Scale (EPDS). If your provider doesn’t offer one, you can ask for it, it’s a quick, validated way to put a number on what you’re feeling and open the conversation.
If at any point you have thoughts of harming yourself or your baby, treat it as an emergency: call or text 988, or go to your nearest emergency room.
Helpful resources: Postpartum Support International, 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.
Frequently Asked Questions
What’s the best way to talk to your doctor about postpartum depression?
Be direct and specific: name what you are feeling, how long it has lasted, and how it is affecting daily life. You do not need the perfect words, and writing your symptoms down beforehand can make the conversation easier.
At SLC Newborn Care, our team provides overnight newborn care for families across the Salt Lake City area. Reach out to us with any questions.
This post is for general information and isn’t a substitute for medical advice.